Session #83- Against the Abbaye De Saint Bon-Chien grain

[caption id="attachment_1560" align="alignleft" width="263"] The Session, a.k.a. Beer Blogging Friday, is an opportunity once a month for beer bloggers from around the world to get together and write from their own unique perspective on a single topic. Each month, a different beer blogger hosts the Session, chooses a topic and creates a round-up listing all of the participants, along with a short pithy critique of each entry.[/caption]

January is all about resolutions and Rebecca over at The Bake and Brew has suggested that we all take a long hard look at the reasoning behind our beer preferences.

"How much is our taste or opinion of a craft beer affected by what friends and the craft beer community at large thinks?"

The Session #83

Against the Abbaye De Saint Bon-Chien Grain

Or, why beer reviews are messing with my mind.

I recently did a tasting review of Abbaye De Saint Bon-Chien in which I spill one of the world's most talked about Swiss beers all over the floor and compare it to fermenting socks.

No matter what my Ridiculous Co-host said, I was (drunk and) unable to find the redeeming complexity that made that beer so highly rated on the rate sites.

I don't care much about what the rate sites say because they don't always agree, but I do watch a lot of beertubers, read a lot of beer blogs, and

all my beer geek friends say it's the best beer ever...

What we now know, in hindsight of the filming, is that in my headstrong determination to enjoy the beer, even though I was more interested in singing christmas songs, was due to the fact that some where I had got the idea in my head that this beer was, "advanced."

Abbaye De Saint Bon-Chien is one of those beers that one does not drink, one must experience.

You don't go springing this baby on a newbie craft beer drinker, oh nooo, waste of your time (and money, lots of money), this beer takes years of palate exercising. When a newbie does insist on sampling a bit, their nose gets all wrinkly and face mushes up, and thats when we are all supposed to lean back in our leather arm chairs and chuckle, "how cute, the new one can't appreciate the complexity of this fine heavenly liquid."



Like Glen from Ithinkaboutbeer Beerisyourfriend mentioned, I had a fear of missing out. I wanted to understand what everyone was gushing about! It was the last bottle in the store- so rare and unique. Not everyone could appreciate it (or afford it). And, although we had already been drinking heavily on big christmas brews, I could not resist those renowned accolades and self inflicted peer pressures from luring me in.

I learned my lesson:

1. You can have too much of a good thing.

2. You may not be able to recognize said good thing.

3. Just because it's rare, expensive, and all your friends say it's the best thing ever does not mean you should get drunk and make a beertube review.

And some might add

4. A beer made with great attention deserves great attention.

But I haven't tried the beer again since this episode, so I still might think it a big ball of sweet & sour, tangy old socks. In a bad way.

Beer reviewing websites, as others have pointed out this month, are not the end-all word of what is top most in the world of beer. We'd have to first agree on what is the best beer style in the world. Literally impossible, because beer trends change daily, by region (according to google).

Read beer reviews, watch beer tube, get involved in discussions about what you like and why because you are more complex and well aged than any beer out there. No one can taste your taste.

This year's beer resolution: do more beer reviews! For you.

XOXO

Corralling the #EBBC13 post herd

 



I admit it- I'm a stalker of all things beer related. When the European Beer Bloggers Conference 2013 rolled around this year, my bitch fest post "I'm not going" was inspired by my inability to host selfless joy in other people's fun. So I've followed the #EBB13 updates graciously put together by fellow beer bloggers with lusty interest.

Like a voyuer in a tree, Nitch sits in France with internet binoculars, watching the fun of the neighbors in Edinborough. Not at all a bad position to be in, since I'm at least in the proper time zone and can see saucy up to the minute twitters without the downside of delayed or lost luggage. I'll wipe the drool from the corners of my mouth and share with you my #EBBC13 amusements.

You know you're as dirty as I am, to know the who said what and what was drank during the orgiastic affair.

In no particular order Nitch's "I've been watching you" #EBBC13 Blog Highlights:

Good Morning Beer Lovers's is one of my regularly followed Swedish beer blogs and adds a great insight into the international aspects of beer blogging. JoeG with four blog mates battled through flight delays (paper vs electronic) and luggage issues, but were not held back from sampling all the the UK had to offer, being mostly impressed by the Brit's ability to make a full body session ale.

Johan with Portersteken lays out a simple net of Three Top Bars in Edinburgh, stating:

"Edinburgh is a great weekend destination for those who need a dose of bagpipes, castles, haggis and good beer."

Ofiltrerat's Magnus regularly does a great job of putting up prompt and concise articles, making sure to get lovely picy pics for visual ad junkies like yours truly. His coverage of the discussion panel with Christer Edvartsen, Elspeth Payne, Tomasz Kopyra and Reuben Gray got into one aspect of international beer blogging that has often tugged my question tail:

"The blogs all in English. Why? For Reuben and Elspeth the choice was not that hard. Both Chris and Tomasz told me that they chose to write in English mainly to reach out and evangelize about local breweries for an international audience to help them out on a larger market."

Christer at BeerNorway had his hands full with interviews and networking during the #EBBC13, so has yet to post anything about the event on his blog, but states clearly on the front page that he posts (mostly) about Norwegian beers. Not only does he post about Norwegian beers but he takes some of the freshest beerp0rn this veteran viewer has ever seen. (0.o)

Matt at Pilgrim and Progress had a great interview with Nøgne Ø's brewer Ingrid Skistad.

[caption id="attachment_1494" align="alignright" width="405"] Stewart Brewing, official host of #EBBC13[/caption]

Although normally Polish Beer Guide's Tomasz only focuses on Polish related beer items, he did dip into a Visit to Stewart Brewing in Edinburgh with a chummy interview video!

Beers I've Known aka Stephanos, says that  although he tried 65 new beers over the three days, "it wasn't just a chance to score free beer, there was also some serious ideas sharing going on too." Displayed clearly in his to the point, ever interesting writing on the entire conference.

Beer Lens is the Playboy of beerp0rn- classy but still very, very porn, they cover #EBBC13 with a professional lens.

Craig Heap writes like you're sitting there next to him, cozy in the middle of a speech and he has just leaned over to comfortably whisper, "psst, the problem with Beer Sommeliers- is it the title?" Which isn't too surprising because he writes for Rum & Reviews and just happens to have a bit of time left over for an entirely Welsh beer dedicated blog- he's a natural.

[caption id="attachment_1495" align="alignleft" width="418"] Bibulous.me's Utopias[/caption]

Bibulous Me makes a bit size round up with quotes (if Garrett says...), insights ("I had forgotten how much I like Edinburgh") and facts (even if it bankrupts you, try Samuel Adams Utopias). YUM!

The Beercast is a go-to for all things outstanding UK beer (but doesn't work in my Newblur due to it's snazzy layout), highlight of the #EEBBC13 is this chapter by Richard on the take-home message of the conference. A joy to read- pure class, we can only hope to write as eloquently.

Billy's Booze Blog does the best job of getting deep into the famed bottle of Sam Adams Utopias 10th Anniversary Edition that I keep hearing about, but is generally spot on with all the #EBBC13 events. His quick tasting notes on the beers of the conference is a great run though of what was being consumed and when.

The Tale Of Ale's own Reuben Gray was not only extremely instrumental in holding the #EBBC13 together but he found time to whip up some great blog postings- my favorite of which is an outing walk through at Steward Brewery, one the of event sponsors. More recently he rolled out a FANTASTIC inside view of the Traquair (pronounced 'track-ware') House: Scotland's oldest continually inhabited house. And, of course, a 300 year old, recently rediscovered (50 years ago) in-house brewery.

Total Ales was the first of the blogs I read along with that gave an outsider a little run down of the pocket price involved in attending:  £100.00 attendance fee, train tickets, a hotel room plus food and drink (yeow) but then continues to gush about how it was all completely worth it.

Live Blogging of #EBBC13

If you haven’t participated in Live Beer Blogging before, here’s a re-cap of what to expect:

Bloggers all spread out and sit among 9 tables in the room and stay in their same seat throughout the hour.

A brewery then has 5 timed minutes per table and goes to 5 different tables throughout the hour. They pour their one beer to the bloggers at each table, and shares insights into the beer, brewery, history, or whatever they want to communicate in that short period of time.

Bloggers then live blog their experience on each beer. Some bloggers may publish an individual post on each beer/brewery, some may write one post that summarizes each beer, and some bloggers live-tweet and/or live-instagram their notes and observations.

Matt from Total Ales also participated in a live blog session, which was full of spunk (beware the Crtl-B bold lock) and wisdom ("I don't worry about how many hits I'm getting I find the most important part of blogging, the writing itself, far more enjoyable") I loved being able to read a live post! New sensations for everyone involved.

[caption id="attachment_1428" align="alignleft" width="225"] Chris Hall learned that, "you should always have a face that people can click on..."[/caption]

Chris at the Beer Diary not only did a live blog but does his usual immensely entertaining bit of capping off the #EBBC13 with What Did We Learn? Noting that he also learned how much beer is body was able to hold:

"Attending the European Beer Bloggers Conference this year filled me with excellent beer and information. Well, mostly beer."

Ofiltrerat does it in Swedish- accents make me tickle.

Diary of a Hop Head compares live blogging to speed dating and gushes over Traquair's Jacobite Ale "So complex" and Ilkley's The Mayan "I love it".

The Ormskirk Baron doesn't say much but there are links and pretty pictures.

Zak at Are You Tasting The Pith? goes all out with full descriptions (and comical editing) including: Badger Roaming Roy Dog with "perhaps too much fruit and not enough fruit [this should read "too much fruit and not enough chocolate"] and Harviestoun Ola Dubh 30th Anniversary Ale with "from a 40yr old first-fill sherry cask, and click on my face if yu can't tell the sherry character bursting out of the glass."

Lady Beer Bloggers!

I hate to segregate but women deserve more attention then men. To be fair, I give female bloggers more attention so it's proper fair that I put them in a double highlighted area, just as they are on my news feed.

Girl Goes Abroad with Tanya (and her partner Jim) had reservations about the term 'conference' when first heading to the #EBBC13, reservations that were soon tossed to the wind. The pair got personal inspiration from foudners of Steward brewing, married couple Steve and Jo- nudging Tanya and Jim to go ahead with their dreams of being drown in the beer world (we support you too!). And of course, they drank great beer.

Beer Beauty is one of my all time absolute favorite beer bloggers in the woman world- she has it all, looks, style, and a fantastic palate. Marverine Cole poses the question: "what do you call a gaggle of beer bloggers?" But wastes no time in hitting up the bars, breweries and networking her pretty little bum off. Cherry topping for us-  a juicy wrap up article where she proclaims her favorite beers of the event:

"WILLIAMS BROTHERS IMPALE IPA, with their BIRDS AND BEES coming a veerrry close second!"

Elspeth Payne is spoiled rotten. She did the discussion panel for #EBBC13 but should also be currently returning home from the U.S. beer bloggers conference. After getting her hands on her first Irish homeland Guinness pour and hobnobbing with Scottish Real Ale Festival and the Independent Beer Festival  goers she might be travel weary. If she survived this Herculean task of travel, sight seeing and beer sampling, we'll know when she posts for the U.S. conference. Simply SPOILED!

Lindsey over at Adventures in Beerland on the other hand might not have survived the #EBBC13, as she has yet to post and has made no attempt to hide that fact that the site is "updated whenever I'm not hungover." Best wishes sister, can't wait to see your follow up! Or at least hope that you had a great time- see you next year!

Technical Notes:

[caption id="attachment_1498" align="alignleft" width="250"] Pilsner Urquell, official sponsor of #EBBC13[/caption]

If I neglected to see someone's post on the event, send your link my way and I'll update my highlight list/add you to my stalking list. Err.. Newsblur.com

Also, you can' go wrong with a look at Zephyr Adventure's official round up of the event.

See you IRL soon!

So we have some video interviews, enticing beerp0rn shots and lots o-lots'a great beer diary writing. I felt involved like a slightly lagging Skype meeting with a paid professional, I'm satisfied but would still prefer the real thing.

Thank you to everyone involved in putting the #EBBC13 together and keeping it running: sponsors, breweries, key note speakers with funny hats, keg tappers, dish washers, yeasty beasts (that make it all possible) and all the folks who dream up such an exciting meeting. Until next year folks, keep up the great work, I am your fan!

I'd shake your hand good evening as I sign off, but... my hands are sticky. (LME is sticky, I home brew and blog, wait.. what did you think I meant? Dirty mind...)

XOXO

Tasting and Thinking- I Hardcore You and Taras Boulba

I Hardcore You Monkey Ghost!

Being a beer reviewer gives one a reason to get another beer from the fridge, effectively isolating them from conversations and social obligations. “I’ve got this new beer to try… so.. bye…”

Here I am, beer sampling and life contemplating as the men in my life pack their toys into bigger toys and ready the band for a week long Monkey Ghost tour in the south west of France.

Being a beer connoisseur also gives one a reason to be mildly anti-social, with relief. No need to drudge through heavily gestured foreign language speech or pretend to be interested in people with completely different interests when one can spend 20 minutes examining and cataloging a beer bottle. To fully ignore and disconnect yourself from the man rabble, take as much time as possible with the following:

[caption id="attachment_1467" align="alignnone" width="696"] Monkey Ghost prepares for the road![/caption]

1. First there is the photographing of the bottle. Different angles and lights, backgrounds and color tones- delete, retake and tag for posting.

2. The glassware needs to be readied. Usually a wine glass or short tumbler will substitute for proper glassware as most houses only offer steins, pints or weizens when asked, "do you have a beer glass?" Remember to rinse with water before pouring to remove any dust, soap resin or lingering whatever that might be residing in the glass.

3. Now comes the opening! Bottle cap examination is in order, why not it the underside of that a sniff as well and then contemplate rather or not to keep the crown top.

[caption id="attachment_1468" align="alignright" width="338"] Taras Boulba and roadie work[/caption]

4. Smelling of bottle opening then pouring. I like to pour my beer in steps instead of one go. Proper pouring takes a good amount of focus so there's no need to trying getting into another one of those failing conversations. Conversations that leave both partners feeling awkwardly unsatisfied, reject people who try to chat with you by nodding and saying yes and no intermittently.

5. After the pour comes the smell and sight appreciation. Remember to hold the glass in the air, to the light so that everyone in the courtyard can see that you are geeking-out to the max and should not be disturbed.

6. Cooing and talking out-loud to oneself is completely natural. Once the under nose wafting becomes unbearably close to the lips, tasting is in order. Small sips, take notes, swash around the mouth, smack the tongue against the roof of mouth and try to make more noise then when you were inspecting the appearance and smell.

7. Now comes the proper note taking rush, no more floundering in water before you get your bearings, time to swim competently. This is also a good time to take a look around and write about the area and people you happen to be planted in.

BRASSERIE DE LA SENNE- Taras Boulba

'Light Blonde 4.5% alc. Generously hopped with the finest aromatic hops, giving it a very refreshing character and a nose reminiscent of citrus.'

A: Great head on a bazed apple juice

S: Bread and rising yeast

T: Bitter, bitter, bitter! Clean citrus and smooth with a great hop bite but not much after taste or lingering bitterness.

M: Medium mouthfeel, smooth, dry finish.

O: Lovely 'extra hoppy', session beer. An every day go-to that should be purchased in mass amounts. Too bad I only have this one bottle. No, I'm not willing to share.

MIKKELLER and BREWDOG- I Hardcore You

9.5% IIPA collaboration that is a mix of Mikkeller's I Beat You and Brewdog's Hardcore IPA that was twice dry hopped after blending, making the beer four times dry hopped.. or does that make six times? Brewdog Blog has lost count.

A: Bright copper with a snow white head that leaves rims of lacing

S: Tropical fruit, citrus and grapefruit

T: No malt backbone just sweet hops finishing bitter and resin. Beautiful light bubbles lifting sweet tart alcohol kisses into the air.

M: Leaves a sticky mouth feel with resins coating your palate.

O: That is a balanced beer! The hops are galaxy exotic sweet floral and fresh fruit. The taste is a roller coaster into hops. An exciting sugar bubble dance followed by a candy coasted passion fruit that smells of sunset on a hot summer day. Like sitting in the yard after gardening, wet earth and drip drying greenery all gently waving you thanks for a job well done. I Hardcore You is a great marriage of two attention whore breweries- there is no denying it’s beauty. As much as I hate glammed-out television personalities like Kim Kardashian, but their lot in life is to be a feast for the eyes and, I hardcore you delivers on it’s label deign and sweet IIPA perfection, beasts of beauty cannot be ignored.

[caption id="attachment_1469" align="aligncenter" width="576"] I Hardcore You[/caption]

As I learn the finer arts of roadie-dom. Color coding wire wraps, towel covered drums and impossible to be perfect puzzle games using musical instruments and metal boxes (and the occasional chrome plated motorbike), I sip away at I Hardcore You with relish. Thank you Ninkasi for the small pleasures in life.

I pour the last quarter of my beer into my Heineken logo beer glass with a sigh and shake of the head at regretfully having purchased a single bottle of this extraordinary beer only to realize that a gnat has taken the final trip down the green fairy river and been face down fermenting in my medical grade IIPA while I wrote my beer praises. Hardcore Figures.

The night is winding to an end as it become obvious that someone will have to walk five paces toward the house and wave at the light generating machine every three minutes. "Yes, hello, we are still here packing vans and trailers like girls packing their bags for an over sea vacation."

Which is a great relief to anti-social, non musical instrument packing Nitch who has run out of beer (good beer) and has resorted to drinking Pierre and enjoying the audio injustice that has been bleating in the background for the past 10 minutes. At least the skipping Lenny Kravitz cd hasn’t bothered anyone else.

I watch a French man chug a glass of Pierre and I am in awe. It's like chugging champagne, I can't do it. I Hardcore dare You to try power drinking soda water.

Vans, trucks, metal boxes and wires all packed and ready to go, I place my one large grocery bag of beer bottles in the back and hope that we'll have wifi where ever it is in France we are heading to this time.

Updating as we go (wifi be willing)- Nitch on the tour road!

XOXO

 

Do you hate-drink beers?

Definition of hate-drinking

noun

the activity of drinking a beer which you consider bad

"Hate-Drinking” is NOT the same as a guilty pleasure. You wouldn’t pick up a beer every week to hate-drink a really “bad” beer — that’s a guilty pleasure. Generally speaking, hate-drinking requires a beer with high ambitions and features a certain amount of aesthetic perfection ... yet fails consistently and badly enough to make it compelling.

-MacMillan Dictionary (adapted for beer)

 

What beers do we hate-drink and for what reason?

"I like the taste of Heineken, it tastes like... Heineken." -Unenlightened friend

In response to which one has no choice but to put the green tempered bottle to their lips and drink the beer that is known to taste like crap, err rather as defined by the above quote, Heineken. We do it so we can reconfirm that it is unacceptable. Like the tupperware container from that back of the fridge your roommate has shoved under your nose insisting, "smell it! It smells so fucking bad!" And inevitably, we smell it. It smells bad. And we'll do it again, my friends, no denying it- humans repeatedly smell, taste and generally love to sense things that make us cringe.

[caption id="attachment_1401" align="alignright" width="300"] Do we hate-drink IPAs for their palate numbing effects?[/caption]

One might argue that extreme beers above 120 IBUs (impossible to sense, but possible to make) or with irrationally high alcohol content are consumed for the torture of the act. So perverse and obscene yet trending so hard that there is no chance of looking away.

Contrary-wise it helps if the hate-drink in question goes down quickly and the price is low: a typical beer like Corona is always purchased in large packages and is never without it's required additive, lime. Corona is hate-drank with such dedication that people have found a way to cope with the fact that their senses tell them it is skunked. Kinda like switching between The History Channel and True-Blood, you can mix it all you want but you are still watching a comedically lame vampire show.

[caption id="attachment_1412" align="alignleft" width="259"] The desired outcome of drinking Duff[/caption]

Another phenomena of hate-drinking is more a feature of the human ability to non-taste for the sake of one's image. Duff beer (fictional Simpson beer brought to life) is often sold/purchased in France as a novelty item to impress tourists and locals (French) alike. Gauging from the TV show, Duff has no taste what-so-ever and is more than likely to lower your IQ and cause irreversible family trauma, yet here sells for a lofty price. Without fail, people drink Duff, then hop on twitter to tell all their friends how bad it is (just like any other macro lager). Then they order another one.

While we are hyphening things let's touch a bit on the a hate-drinking cousin: 'binge-drinking'. Binge drinking is the act of bathing one's insides with as much tasteless, ice-cold beer as possible. Homer Simpson is an icon of the binge drinking sport. But, with all due respect, ancient egyptians likely drank more beer then we did, so binge-drinking might be more natural to us then monogamy.

Moving right along.

My biggest run in with a hate-drink: Rogue's VooDoo Maple Bacon Ale (tasting review here). I hated it so much, I had to buy another bottle to share with my friends the epic face plant failure of Rogue. I'd hate taste it again if I came across it. Just to really, REALLY make sure it's still so fantastically bad. (Which, I'm sure it is).

What beers do you find yourself hate-drinking? Again and again, you sip, sample and possibly even order these beers for the sheer enjoyment of telling yourself (and those around you) that you hate it. Perhaps there is a once loved brew that (with your new found beer culture conscious) has developed into a parody of 'craft' beer. Or an aesthetically tasteful beer that has all things going for it in principle but doesn't live up to it's snazzy label design and marketing? Or maybe you just love to hate anything outside the BJCP style guidelines, I don't judge. Tell, tell! (but remember hate-drinking is NOT guilty pleasure, see above definition)

XOXO

 

Stone CEO Greg Koch's online argument with vblogger

"I don't get beat down easy, but man forums can really take a lot out of you. I stopped commenting on them as they too often kept me from doing the job I love." -GK

Greg Koch (GK, in trendy kid talk) recently completed a row of video blog battles with well known video blogger StumpyJoeJr (Ryan Reschan). The two had been tossing back and forth video responses to each other about Stumpy Joe's Arrogant Bastard Ale review, in which, he gave the ol' AB a D rating.

Initial Arrogant Bastard Ale Review about one month ago:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=My82sTtVzmo&feature=share&list=TLq4ZVDrfqw6E

GK, as busy as he is, takes time to make a video response to the review. He states that he was caught off guard by the D rating and that the text was written in a different era (1997). He pokes a bit of fun at Ryan's weak, bitter loving palate.

"The beer or me are not the one's saying you're not worthy, that is up to the person themselves to decide."

http://youtu.be/OjoXvYbGiH8

Ryan responds to GK's video in shock but states that he still thinks the beer is too bitter and that it doesn't have the drinkability of other hoppy ales. He also complains that the Better Beer Authority reviewed AB with some big thumbs down but was rewarded with a personal interview and apology re-review with the Stone CEO meeting while Ryan only got trash talked.

http://youtu.be/A3NxWKHJt0k

Ryan then goes on to say that he thought GK would contact him directly, in private but instead was handed another video response!

http://youtu.be/YoTlJbQtgvs

They both seemed highly aggravated by the each other's arrogance, (maybe GK was living up to that famous Arrogant Bastard stereotype), chest pumping with things like: "I feel like you're calling me out a bit here." 

Maybe they should get together and have a beer?

http://youtu.be/p7XhrG9WRPY

"We shot all this in June at Ryan's house. My 1st 'response' was shot in front of his house, and my 2nd one was shot in his back yard. We were wondering if any of Ryan's friends were going to spot that or not. Each time we shot our segments the other person was just off camera goading & laughing. I really had to push Ryan to be more mean in his responses as it's just not his nature! Thanks Ryan for doing this & helping highlight the importance of civil discourse. You're an awesome dude." -GK

I admit to having a beer geek crush on Greg Koch. He is my Elvis/Jesus/Louis Pasteur and I respect him in the highest manner possible for being nearly the coolest guy alive today (nearly because Bill Nye is still around, my first love). The only thing that would make me love him more is if he was a female.

Which clearly he isn't- note the lush man beard with touches of Sean Connery grey.

Thus, my yt comment was gushing fan goo:

If I make a REAL bitchy beer review of Arrogant Bastard Ale, can I too can get GK in my house, on my couch, drinking my beer, making up words and stoner pausing.

Beer-geek-gasm.

You can come too Ryan.

XOXO

I couldn't help myself, I was smitten over the delightful turn of events in what otherwise seemed like an extremely awkward internet argument.

Point being, internet conversation degenerates very quickly into trollish commentaries thusly the collaboration on a funny video blogging to demonstrate civil discourse, well played gentlemen, well played.

R&R Coconut IPA (so named for home brewer competition winners, Ryan and Robert) talked about in a quick interview with Beer Geek Nation:

http://youtu.be/omrYl5STeR4

 

I want a Greg Koch to tackle me.

Let there be beer and beer bloggers

After Justin's Session #77 wrap up and reading nearly all the beer blogger responses, I discovered that I developed a slight twitch each time my web readers scan the word IPA. 33+ bloggers from around the world converged on the question: "Why is <twitch> IPA a big deal?"

Answer:

1. HOPS! for the taste/flavor

2. Different than mass-produced “macro” beer

3. Hype/abundance of supply

One of the best things about The Session is getting a look at each writer's views and adding some new beer blogs to one's Newsblur list.

I added Looke from LikelyMoose after reading his <twitch> IPA lover's break down, suggesting that the contrast between the macro lager is what drives our hop passion: "It's a beer for real beer lovers and it helps to set us aside from those that drink any old swill just to get drunk. We drink it and love it because it's not like your average beers..."

Always curious to know more about a blog's author I read his about page and did an honest, LOL to my empty office room, gasping for air and shaking my head. Genius:

Favourite Nicki Minaj Song: Beez in the Trap.

Most disliked artist in the history of music: Nicki Minaj

Not only do Looke and I share the fate of being nicknamed by people who have reading impediments, but we share precisely the same view on Nicki Minaj.

Looke goes on to post about Let there be beer, which I read about only today- ties in lovely to my rant.

Let there be beer!

http://youtu.be/GpcO3WdrgsQ

The Let There Be Beer campaign is currently on Facebook and Twitter, with their own website expected August 11th 2013 and focuses on advertising for general beer consumption.

Looke states: As well as CAMRA this campaign is being backed by AB-inbev, Carlsberg, Heineken, Miller Brands and Molson-coors. I like the idea of all of the big boys in brewing coming together and just saying “look. Let’s just have a beer”

Let there be beer! Or let there be intoxication?

Although I admire CAMRA's eternal quest to bring people into the beer world- I feel there might be other, possibly better, ways to promote good quality beer drinking. Beer Bar Band's upcoming Session will likely give some great fresh insight into craft beer marketing, from the people for the people.

Which is also why I squint an eye at CAMRA working with the macro devils, I see them as the enemy and prefer to promote people drinking good quality red wine, with locally grown products, rather then suggest an ice cold Heineken to quench stressed souls.

Post long work days, awkward family situations and blazing hot bbqs all require something in one's hand that can be placed between them and the world. Social lubricant is important, I agree and often insist, but defining beer as simply a reward for bearing the weight of a shitty position causes it to become like vodka in the 60's.

Shhh.. no one has to know that you are drinking.

[caption id="attachment_1301" align="alignnone" width="696"] The secret to holiday cheer is to be so secretly smashed off your head that you aren't aware your mother is cheating on your father, your auntie thinks your gay and your brother hasn't said a word. Classic.[/caption]

Promoting the savoring and responsible enjoyment of alcohol instead of it's socially dimming effects is the turn that progressing craft beer culture is making.

[caption id="attachment_1302" align="alignright" width="300"] Husband pleasing breakfast beer is likely to work about the same[/caption]

Beer is an intoxicant, but then so are cigarettes, shopping, exercising and coffee. Coffee ads don't show people having a cup then cranking out a million invoices, even though people often junkie up on ground coffee beans for just that reason (don't even get me started on energy drinks). Instead, they advertise about how lush and decant a good cafe in the morning is.

Coffee people smell coffee beans like we smell hops- THAT is what 'Let there be beer' should be focusing on. How a great beer can make you smile, how sharing a home brew with a friend is akin to being Santa Claus and how the post work drink is to be looked forward to because it tickles you- not because you need it. Let there be GOOD beer and not just any beer to help dull the pain of reality.

Nitch sticking her tongue out at the efforts of the marketing monsters and on to hunt the city for a cold gueze with some friends.

Hmph

XOXO

 

Ladies confused by beer or bad advice

"You walk into a bar. You pick up a beer menu. You’re a LADY, and you’re not sure what to order.”

This video makes me cringe.

[caption id="attachment_1234" align="alignright" width="220"] 1950s cans were marketed for both men and women, but were likely to have tasted like the metal they came in.[/caption]

This isn't the 1940's, you (most likely) are not wearing pearl earrings and a girdle, so although you are a LADY that doesn't mean you are a segregated and looked upon as a different species. Ladies being confused by beer or confused by bad advice- I vote the latter.

Claire Lower in her article today called: 'Ladies be confused by beer: Please stop trying to identify what a person drinks based on their genitals.' She rips the video into beautiful tiny weeny little shreds that are just about dainty enough to pass right through the video presenter's (and her bulky man mule's) itty bitty brains.

She goes on to state that: The Higgs Boson is confusing. Things written by David Lynch are confusing. The fact that my skin is both oily AND flaky is confusing. Beer is actually pretty simple.

All well made points that Nitch agrees with fully. She continues her points as they are taken into detail, ranting about the fact that they list three 'beers' while one is a cider, that the presenter is excited over a the 'pretty red' color of one beer and that the beer 'professional' is, in fact a male and excludes darks beers.

One of the reasons ladies through out recent history (we are talking the past, oh, 100 years or less) have had a dislike for beer is that beer tastes bad. Macro swill is gross (due to more reasons then is listable) and the female wonder women taste buds detect that while men were able to blind eye it in search of the intoxicating effect. Women are more likely to have better palates then men. "Better means that they can taste more flavors and smell more aromas because they havemore taste bud receptors."- Why women have better palates.

Sugar, Spice and Everything Nice

"Women tend to gravitate to sweet things" says the video beer 'professional'. This is a common statement because we've been told (by media and social conditioning) that we should. Note that the childhood saying say 'sugar, SPICE and EVERYTHING NICE.' Chocolate is sugar, hops are spicy, whiskey barrel aged double pecan porter is everything nice"

As for putting fruit in your beer. Damn Widmer Brothers (and later, Blue Moon), thank you for starting that crap. Absolutely don't put effing fruit in your beer, unless you are a professional beer cocktail mixologist, nothing should go in your beer other then your upper lip.

[caption id="attachment_1247" align="alignleft" width="420"] A women's place is in the kitchen- over the brew kettle[/caption]

While on the topic of upper lips, make sure that your lips aren't greased and painted while sampling. Lipgloss and beer don't mix! Take it from me, a highly lady like woman who loves the ol' rogue and whale fat lip concoctions (I don't think my lipstick is really made of whales any more, I donate to the Sea Shepard), take a second in the bathroom to remove lip products before beer time. After drinking, or when there is a change from beer to something else, re-apply the gloss and color.

Ladies confused by beer -No-

Ladies confused by bad advice -Yes-

If you walk into a bar, you pick pick up a beer menu and you're a LADY, try not to be defined by what is in your pants (or skirt) but rather take a moment to think about how you feel, what you are interested in at present and ask the servers questions. It is their job to sample and explain the extensive beer list- if they are unable to do so, then leave- they hired idiots, they don't know what they are doing.

Happy beer hunting, ladies and gents!

XOXO

Canadian beer is stronger than American beer

I saw this video over at Shades of Pale Brewing's Blog and, although I don't like country music (or conform with any of the stereo types listed in the song) I laughed out loud remembering the friendly banter I've shared with friends from Northern Cold Country.

http://youtu.be/2E064kb3UnU

Our silly billy Canada cousins (as it turns out) have this rough rumble battle going on between us and them, but most Americans are oblivous to Canada all together. We don't know too much about the norther cold lands and don't see them as someone to battle with. Americans are too busy pissing off countries over the ocean to notice that we have a raggle tag bunch above us who want to play footsie.

That being said, hold the phone:

IS CANADIAN BEER STRONGER THAN AMERICAN BEER? (that just doesn't seem right...)

Mr.Spiess over that Fermentarium has multiple posts on the topic, satisfying my shaking head and turning it into a nod. Aw yes, we win. Again. Not much of surprise, (insert chest puffing and pompous grin).

Think global, drink local

Traveling has made me more of a patriot then I assumed I could be. Double standards like: I can make fun of my country, but you can't followed by, 'yeah, well okay dude, like, I'll agree about the President bit, but leave Busweiser outta this.' When our sweet and sour name calling gets too deep I pull out my finishing move, 'listen, if American wanted to own Canada, we would. End of story. We took Alaska and left all the shitty blank stuff in the middle to the French.'

No real offense intended of course, because there are a million things that we (the American government) do without true use of our democratic rights. For every back country thing I can spit about the Canadians, they have a dozen or more things to toss back. It's imbarassing how little footing my country has to stand on, 'um, yeah but like, we have the Kardashians. Wait, is that point for your side or mine?'

[caption id="attachment_1230" align="alignright" width="640"] Please do not define America by our Television[/caption]

 

 

 

 

 

The conversation would then turn from Canada vs America to both of us versus Australia and the rest of the world. Most people outside Northern America can't tell the difference between the American and Canandian accent anyway.

New acquaintance: "So.. are you Canadian?"

Me: "Nope, American."

New acquaintance: "Oh! I'm so sorry, I can't tell the difference between the accept. I'm really sorry."

Me: "Sorry about what?"

New acquaintance:  "Most Canadians get upset if I guess that they are American. Americans don't mind being called Canadian?"

We don't mind being called Canadian, as we consider Canada a cousin, long distance and far off with some diseased cancerous areas filled with French people. American beer, Canadian beer, Mexican beer- when we drop all the ethnic jokes, there is one thing we all share, a love of being drunk.

But soon, Canada, American and Mexico we will all be as one: The Amero!

XOXO

The Session #77- Why the (hop) hype?

Beer Blogging Friday is in session!

Beer bloggers from around the world converge on Justin's Beer Blog for the monthly installment of opinion and rant chat.

'Each month, a different beer blogger hosts The Session, chooses a topic, and creates a round-up that lists all of the participants.'

I've been eyeing The Sessions for a few months now, but have always seemed to have missed the cut off or been mentally delayed on rhetoric. This month's topic:  what makes the India Pale Ale (IPA) style of beer so popular- a topic that hits home for me.

'I don't care if a watered-down pilsener is labeled as "triple-hops brewed"; it wouldn't satisfy someone looking for an IPA.'

Nitch is looking for an IPA! And because she lives in France, IPA is impossible to find. Correction, not impossible- just really effing difficult.

To which people always shrug their shoulders, palms to the air, stating, 'but you have Belgium right there!' Oh yes, I know. And Germany, the Pilznering, lager loving maniacs are next door as well. Nitch doesn't fancy lagers- haven't been a fan since I realized that there were other brewing possabilities than what was mandated but the Reinheitsgebot. Call it a Saccharomyces cerevisiae discrimination that turns my nose up when that specific brand of yeast friend is used in anything drinkable. I'm more of a 'from the top down' kinda woman, if ya know what I mean.

[caption id="attachment_1177" align="alignleft" width="320"] Fox Valley Foodie talks about the difference between Ales and (Meh) Lagers.[/caption]

And what about being snug a bug by Belgium? Well, lets compare it to California and Mexico. San Diego to Tijuana is MUCH closer in drive time (although, maybe not as safe) than Paris to Brussels, but shares the same lack of beer transfer. Oh sure, Mexico gets imports from America, but it sure ain't Stone IPA. Likewise, America gets Corona and not the itty bitty baby craft breweries that are budding in Mexico. The same with France and Belgium- we get Duvel, La Chouffe and Lindeman's Kriek readily at the grocery store (and Corona, mind you) but we don't see the craft beers that have saved the Belgian brew culture from sinking. On that same row, Belgium (and the rest of the world) doesn't see the lovely craft beers that are (all be it a little slowly) flowing about France.

So sure, I can track down some a Mikkeller IPA after a 20 minute tram ride, 10 minute bus ride and a 15 minute walk but then I stare down the barrel of a price tag which makes me consider skipping my rent payment and I long, deeply and whole heartedly for the days of Ninkasi Tricerahop IPA at the corner store.

While reading A Good Beer Blog, I had an 'ah ha' moment as to why my addiction to IPA is currently so strong. Alan passed on some Gen-X nuggets of wisdom he had once received: 'the most attractive girl at the party was the one with the accent.' The hype over the hop, for me, is partialy because the hop tastes like home and at the same time, it is the most exotic. The IPA might have a long history in the UK, with hops being used in beer since the fourteen hundreds, but in today's beer culture- American brewers have the know how on hop brews.

[caption id="attachment_1176" align="alignright" width="445"] Nothing like the blast of fresh infused hops to make the tongue tickle![/caption]

Even things like the Duvel Tripel Hop, while having been brewed since 2007 (which implies that they've had time to tweek and perfect their recipe), doesn't ring my bell the way a clean fresh blast of Randall The Enamel Animal injected IPA does. Whoosh! Sip. Wham, Pow, Pop! Phew.

My partner is French- extremely French, with high cheese and bread standards that cause him refuse food rather than touch mediocre grubs, a foodie to the max. Since him and I have been in relations, we've had our eye balls popped out at each other like looney tunes over which is better: wine or beer. We've debated the historical and social values, health detriments and benefits then sat down and agreed to disagree. He was raised French and I'm an Oregonian- in terms of nectar of the gods, we come from two different schools of worship entirely.

After three years of partnership- he is a hop addict and he isn't even aware of it yet. My French man hasn't been to America since his beer epiphany, but he will take a beer like BrewDog's Punk IPA (not a fantastic brew, but hop headed like a mother eff) and giggle like a school girl. His eyes will roll back and I'll watch with jealousy as he deeply inhales the hop resins with his big French nose nuzzled just above the beer bubbles. It's sexual, these little green flowers and no amount of substitution will replace the real thing.

[caption id="attachment_1184" align="aligncenter" width="737"] This is what we get in France[/caption]

"Unlike wine, which tastes like earth, spice, fruit and maybe sunshine, hops taste like a mountain river. You don't get that kind of sense from any other liquid. I can taste the river rocks, smell the mountain air and glacier water. IPAs taste like the other side of nature from wine." -The French Man

So, after we pull our minds out of the hop house and take our hiking boots off, (hop body scrub anyone?) lets take a look at one other thing that makes Nitch not afraid to tattoo her heart with hops: I'm not too cool.

I'll agree that if I was still in a strong beer culture, where IPAs are getting crazy mixed into new 'styles' and every pub, bar and restaurant carried at least one IPA, then sure, I could imagine my palate wanting variety. All good things in moderation.

Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit. -W. Somerset Maugham

I had a fairly strong romance brewing with sours (sour stouts in particular) before starting world travels and continue my face pinching appreciation with Belgian Cantillons when possible (although still not easily accessable or pocket book friendly here either). So sure, I would have my time (and belly) full with options other than IPA if I wasn't in a creative beer desert. There is nothing like a nose full of hops to wake up one's appreciation of beer.

What I keep hearing from bloggers who are waist deep in beer revolution is, "I'm not a hop head" (anymore). You (most of you) know that hops were what helped lure you away from the macro swill that was standard like breast milk. Now you are branching out, which is natural because you've been beaten over the head with hops and are gaining more depth in the tasting field. Call it a hop soul cleansing that has completed it's cycle.

But now, it's as if people who are on the crest of the beer world are too cool to appreciate hops at the fore front of brews because IPAs have been taken over by hipsters. Alors, dégage hipsters (pardon my French). They are hop crazy because it's the cool thing to do, but also because craft beer is hip. I'm not cool, I wear high waisted pants and I like IPAs nearly as much as I love my  Maui Coconut Porter.

The IPA trending craze will hopefully lead new drinkers onto to greener (or maltier) pastures when given time, so let the IPA fever continue and those who develop in beer will do so. Those who don't like IPA rage can move on (to other creative beer styles). But to look down one's nose at the progression of the IPA is to be just like being the cool kids. Soon, hipsters will like what you now like and then you'll have to find something else! Where does it end?

To recap on 'whats the deal with IPA craze' to Nitch:

[caption id="attachment_1182" align="alignleft" width="334"] Am I addicted to hops? I just spent 6€50 on a Punk IPA at the one bar in town that sells the only IPA.[/caption]

1. Distance makes the heart grow fonder- IPA is exotic to me in a way that only an expat can understand. The hop blast delivered by American IPAs is like walking into a bar and getting imitate and prompt service, you simply can't get it in France no matter how much you wave and smile.

2. Hops are their own beast- maybe because they are the closest relative to Mary Jane, endowing them with some kind of unstudied psychedelic powers or maybe because they effect the body in slightly sexual way (some more then others), whatever the case, hops are for sure a distinct character that is complimented by the malt sugar balance and efferveance bubble display of beer. They have the ability to turn life long wine lovers into blossoming beer connoisseurs- they are the shady side of nature.

3. I'm not too cool- . Oh sure, IPAs are popular and it's embarrassing some of the crazy things people do for a stronger dose of the drug (ahem, Randall the enamel animal) but that doesn't mean that one should slink off in serach of next big (but currently under appreciated) thing. If you are too cool to say you love IPAs then maybe you are suffering from the same "harder to reach the sweeter the apple" complex as in Nitch's point #1, and spending more time and money on ever harder to find brews when there are highly quaffable liquids within reach.

Oh okay, so I sound like I would snort crushed hops off a bathroom stall toilet paper holder with a stranger, but try going without it (or the option of it) for a few years and see what happens to your will power.

In any case, that is the IPA craze breakdown in my neck of the world woods, I can't wait to read across some of what other international bloggers are cranking out! Hopefully I'll get signed up for an IPA anonymous group until I'm once again living in a higher per capita of beer culture.

Nitch's Session #77 rant signing off with a little video showing what happens to Nitch when she receives her home brew hop delivery.

Don't judge me.

http://youtu.be/atC_8aTGRtM

XOXO

Triptych Beer Snob

Kickstarter funded Savoy, Illonois brewery Triptych asked it's beer lovers to make a 30 second ad showcasing their down to earth, local loving style.

Beware the Triptych Beer Snob!

http://youtu.be/f7av3w8yclg

I've seen people like that.

Lets be honest, I've been people like that. And if you are reading a beer blog, then you have as well. Space beer would be something Nitch would ramble about to a random beer bellied man at a pub. The price of a beer is important as well. Take a look at Mikkeller's list of high price one time only brews contesting the Bruery in hoarding temptation. There is nothing wrong with being a beer snob! The term is likely to have been confused over the years, as it should have been beer enthusiast. The French are cheese snobs, not because they are assholes, but because they are usually surrounded by high quality cheese. The local grocery store sells better quality items then most Americans can get the special order department of Whole Foods. At some point in history the cold lager swillers took at look at the intelligent craft beer loving geek at the bar, rambling about Dog Fish head's new Midas Touch, a beer brewed from remnants of material found in a 2,700 year old drinking urn and decided, "that guy is a snob." We got tagged by the swillers and haven't had the pride to let go of the negative title. I am a beer snob. I like good beer and I like to talk about crazy beers.

Congrats Triptych for spreading the dislike of intelligence and informative people. Boo.

 

XOXO

Global Warming Beer

One might think that beer titled "global warming beer" might have something to do with a charity of some kind, but oohhh not so my dear friends. Think more "capitalizing on a shitty situation." The first brewery of the world's largest island,  Greenland Brewhouse takes a few extra chips off the ol' 2,000 year old ice cap and tries to create something magic.

"On July 31 a team of canny entrepreneurs unveiled Greenland Beer, an ale brewed with water melted from Greenland's ice cap, at a public tasting in Copenhagen, Denmark."

Wiki notes that the poor brewery didn't make it well through the years, but the website still has contacts and locations for ordering.

[caption id="attachment_427" align="alignleft" width="461"] Global warming beer?[/caption]

"The microbrewery filed for bankruptcy in October 2008. A month later—in November 2008—the main shareholder, Greenland Ventures, decided against further investment in the company and the brewery was declared bankrupt. The main Greenlandic newspaper Sermitisiaq reported the brewery left behind four million kroner in debt."

Being the first inuit brew house is interesting enough to be put on my list of things to do, but showcasing a fancy water source from a dying natural resource might not have been the best move.

We know that water is a VERY important to the composition of beer. People living in the middles ages had a better go at life if they imbibed only beer, like the stupid blond guy from the movie Cabin Fever. These people were able to stay healthier then their water sipping friends because the act of boiling the water removes most of the deadly aspects that can live in contaminated water. That being said, is boiling down the ice cap water going to remove some of those lovely pre historic aspects?

People on the rating sites don't seem overly impressed with the brew with average ratings and mild notes mostly adding things about how they taste thin or light but balance well.

I'll keep an eye out for this one and would love some first hand accounts of this Ice-capped effect on the beer, even if it has nothing to do with saving the planet.

Let's think on Brew Packs

Taster pack

Variety pack

Holiday pack

Survival pack

Beer can come in an assortment of mix and match ways ranging from Oskar Blue's new CANundrum to classic Sam Adams variety and seasonal sets.

These are all great ideas for people like me, who flow from stout to saison in a single day or breweries that want to offer a pre-packaged dose of holiday cheer but what good do these mix brew packs do?

Most respectable bottle shops sell beers as individuals anyway, so one can always grab a cardboard box and some ribbon to throw together a persionalized variety set.

Lets warm up the ol' hamster in the wheel- why don't more then one brewery get together to make a truly MIXED set? Granted, from a marketing and sales stand point, who would want buyers picking up beers from a competitor's shelf and profitting along with you. Team work people! TEAM WORK! "Beer is good, although we may not be," as my grandmother always says, so how about we let beer work it's magic without our material gains getting in the way.

How about having four different breweries each make a specific beer for charity, sold only in a combined set. The set would donate proceeds to, something meaningful, like orphaned children. Little Annie Brew Pack. The new family pack!

Beers for better homes.

No?

Eco! All organic pack from brewers who do all organic brews. Part of the proceeds can go to "anti Monsanto infected beer" sign paint.

Too hippy?

Santa!



Breweries can be the new holiday icon. Proceeds from multi brewery holiday pack go to granting christmas wishes to sad, wide eyes children or IPA lacking inhabitants of foreign countries <cough, cough Nitch>

Children and alcohol not so socially correct?

Global warming! "Cool Beers for a Cool World"

Anti Whaling! "A Whale of a Beer box set to help the Sea Shepard"

Forest fires! "Smokey beers from three breweries who want you to remember that YOU can prevent forest fires"

Okay, lets give the mental hamster a rest for now. Let me know what you come up with!

XOXO

 

Australia is Lost!

Fosters Sells to SABMiller

http://youtu.be/TqhKtlfQJAA

The tear jerking bit is at the end. The CEO finishes with a smile saying that is job is to make sure the people are well looked after and that the company has the right kind of future. Beautifully spoken and yet there is something missing in all this...

At no point does any one of these people talk about the quality of the product. BEER! What about the BEER?! What will happen to the quality of an australia lager is reorganized for mass production? This man is not a brewer. If you pause the video and look very closely you can see the gold coins glinting in his eyes. Dollar signs fuel his smile. He is most likely a wine drinker. Kiss good bye the integrity of yet another brewery.

As if Australia doesn't already have a lack in individuality now they are selling pieces of their finite culture! What is the cost of becoming a concubine? They will have better over seas marketing and shiny new retirement plans, but they will have live with the fact that they will always be in bed with SABMiller. Fosters has become just another notch in a playboy company's bed post. No matter how they try to justify selling themselves, I will mourn the lost of Australia's vestal brewery.

"Fosters! Australian for beer!"
"Fosters! Not actually drank by Australians!"

Not only do most places in Australia not sell Fosters but most people don't buy it where it is available. Lets be honest, it is what Budweiser is now to the U.S. It has a home country and a history but now is simply a poster child for something that is not real. They are all the same lager with different labels.
Budweiser does not define U.S.A and Fosters does not do justice to Australia. But if you are in Japan and want to be cool, you can always crack open an ice cold (and make sure it is cold enough to freeze off your taste buds) Miller lite to impress the friends. So American of you! Having a bbq? Why not make it an Aussie one? Chug some Australian Lager! Which for some reason has much the same ice cold taste as its American counter parts. No worries, its the style you were going for not the quality.

Go Fosters, become SABMiller's whore, we are better off without you.